You got bra on?

Why is it that when I am drinking wine and I come up with hilarious ideas for a blog...the next day it is never quite as funny? Or, the next day, I sit there and look at the notes I scrawled and wonder, "What did I mean by, put your bra on"? I must really have a thing about bra wearing, that as of yet has not completely unveiled itself to even me! Ha, now I remember about the whole bra thing. I had to go through a metal detector at one of the courthouses and I set the blasted thing off. So, I did all the normal things like took off my shoes, my sweater (lucky for me, I planned in advance and wasn't wearing sleeveless) and I walked back through. Beep, beep, beep. OK, so now, I looked up at the guy and he said, "Do you have any metal replacement parts"? Now this, I had to think about...Did I? Was he talking like metal dental replacement parts? Like as in amalgam? Or did he mean like hip replacement parts? For just a minute, I had to think about it and I guess that was what me more suspicious then the guy standing behind me that was carrying (I kid you not) all his worldly possessions in two paper bags. So, I was pulled aside for a "Body" search. Now typically, I am not one that would shy away from "special attention", but come on, this is my body we are talking about here. While I may not have metal replacement parts, I have all sorts of things holding other things in place. Some are balanced rather precariously and I don't relish closer inspection by a stranger. So, there I stood, with my sweater off, my arms held out by my side and he began ravaging me with both his eyes (I swear, he sort of liked me, thought I was cute in a "like his mother way") and this foot long wand. Really, he must of thought I'd hidden some sort of device between my legs- even my masseuse knows better then to go near the inner thighs, come on people- some areas are just off limits! Just about when I was beginning to weakly protest a female guard walked over and whispered something into the young studly guards ear. He straightened up and backed away from my thighs and told me, "You are good to go". The female guard leaned over to me and said, "It's the under wire in your bra that is setting off the metal detector". Bright red, I quickly redressed and walked over to where my companion was patiently waiting and told him, "It was my stinking bra, the under wire set of the alert". My companion looked at me sort of puzzled and said, "Wow, how much wire is in there, because my metal glasses didn't set off any alarms, I'm just saying"...