My Life, Quite Ordinary.

OK. Settle down people, I know it has been awhile, but I figured it was better to wait until I had something to say. Not that I have anything worthy to say today, but I got busy cleaning and cooking today and that always makes me think about letting all my Friends and family know, "Don't try that at home". So, I got this new fangled vacuum slash mop dealie. Yea, my cleaning lady came back- finally. I guess she never read the blog where I was acting totally out of character and making derogatory references re: her mullet, but, that was just a low point in my life, I am better now! Anyhow, she came back and since she left me, I guess things actually got better for her... I am sure she found more time in her day, for starters! Well, she arrived ready to tackle the home that no one cared for in the past nine months- to think, I could have had a baby in the time she was gone. Luckily for all of us- that didn't happen, but it coulda, it coulda. I just decided I didn't want to bring another innocent babe into this messy economy- not to mention, I have been on this low carb diet for months and I didn't want to mess up the six pounds I'd lost. So, Miss Baby Come Back Cleaning Lady brought in this new piece of equipment called the Hoover Floormate- Isn't the name great? I mean every time I hear it, I think of Playmate and I get all happy. But this little mate plugs in and I think most of the newer models probably take batteries...OK. now I will stop joking and making inappropriate references towards my cleaning lady and her equipment. But let me tell you, this little sucker works like a charm. Because it sucks, it takes one step out of the process, you can get right down to business and before you know it- your floors are sparkling clean! And this morning, I decided to pull out the identical model I found on EBAY and put it to good use. My floors looked marvelous- but that was before I decided to make the Butternut Squash soup. Big mistake. Once again, I reached up high into my pantry to pull out that relic, the food processor, but this time I knew I could outsmart it and not fall into the same trap I fell into nine months ago, when I first used the little bastard. This time, I knew in advance that you had to fill the little hole up- before you poured the liquid crap in. This time, I had experience on my side. One little problem I figured out- after I'd poured what looked like gallons of a soupy mess on my counters and floors... You gotta put the blade in first. Needless to say, my floors were a mess and I found squash in my hair and all over the front of my shirt and that my friend was not funny at all. Finally, the soup is essentially done and I take a taste. It tastes, well nothing like the fabulous Butternut Squash soup I get at that little place called Green-n-Grill. My soup tastes like a diet version, but after all, we are talking about a vegetable, right? I mean..squash... that is already a diet food. Just because I mixed in a little Cream of Sherry and heavy whipping cream... It is still on my diet- right?